Fox: WOLF! You’re heading straight for the cannon!
Wolf: It’s not my fault! I can’t ride a motorcycle!!
Fox: Wow. He really is awfully brave, isn’t he?
Piranha: Well, yes, In Bolivia we have a name for people like that. We call them “idiots.”
–The Bad Guys (book 3) by Aaron Blabey
Shark: You both need to stop arguing. It’s starting to really UPSET me…
Snake: Warning, schmorning! Do your worst, you dimwitted Hero wannabe!
Wolf: That’s it!
Shark: Don’t do it, Wolf.
Wolf: Too late!
MUNCH!
Snake: Let me out of here right now!
Marmalade: Hey! Did he just eat the snake?
Shark: Aw, I warned you, Wolf!
MUNCH!
Marmalade: And you just ate the wolf!
Wolf: Shark, what do you think you’re doing?! Spit me out!
Shark: No. Not until you can both learn to be friends.
–The Bad Guys (book 3) by Aaron Blabey
Snake: I’ve heard of you! You’re that billionaire mad scientist.
Wolf: Billionaire mad scientist? He’s a guinea pig!
Marmalade: So what?! Just because I’m a guinea pig, I CAN’T BE a billionaire MAD scientist?
Wolf: Oh. Well, no…I supposed you could be…
–The Bad Guys (book 3) by Aaron Blabey
Snake: Hey, Many, can we talk about this for a second?
Wolf: There’s no time to talk! Hold on little buddies. It’s time to go BE A HERO!
SWOOSH! SPLAT!
…Piranha: If we survive this, I’m going to eat that wolf.
Snake: Not if I do first.
–The Bad Guys (book 1) by Aaron Blabey
Snake: Are you going to dress up like an old lady AGAIN? It doesn’t work, man. You ALWAYS get caught!
Wolf: Who said anything about me?
[silence]
–The Bad Guys (book 1) by Aaron Blabey
Wolf: We need to be able to SMELL trouble! In fact…wait a second…I think I can smell trouble right now. Wow, it’s really strong, actually. Hang on. That’s not…AW, WHO FARTED?!
–The Bad Guys (book 1) by Aaron Blabey
Wolf: Hey, where are your hats?
Snake: They looked dopey.
Piranha: I don’t really have a head.
Shark: I ate mine.
–The Bad Guys (book 1) by Aaron Blabey
Snake: Hey, shouldn’t you two be in water?
Shark: I’LL BE WHEREVER I WANT. GOT IT?
Piranha: Me too, chico.
Snake: See? This is why I don’t work with fish.
–The Bad Guys (book 1) by Aaron Blabey
Well, let me tell you something buddy — Just because I’ve got BIG Pointy Teeth and Razor-Sharp Claws and occasionally like to dress up like an old lady, that doesn’t mean I’m a Bad Guy.
–The Bad Guys (book 1) by Aaron Blabey